I called a local Support network for domestic violence survivors this week. No one answered, so I left them a message. I hope to reach out to others in my community and to share the work I’ve been doing to get better from trauma. For over a year and a half now I’ve grappled with the thought that networks like that are for people really in need, that since I am no longer experiencing abuse, those networks are not for me. But, I realize now that’s exactly what they are there for. I also have a fear that they will tell me they can do nothing for me and to just shut up and get over it. I think I feel that way because after I was raped and went to seek help, they told me they can’t help me and to just shut up and get over it.
I also made a dentist appointment! I have been avoiding going to the dentist for over 10 years. Going to the dentist is a high anxiety experience. I feel trapped and like my space and privacy is being invaded. I also am distrustful of dentists. I have had some bad experiences in the past with them. I read many trauma victims experience this same anxiety of dentists. I consider going to the dentist being a very big step for me in the way of breaking the symptom of avoidance.