Posts Tagged influence
Since the SuperBetter book came out on September 15th, I got a few messages and emails about it and how am I doing today. I somehow missed that the book came out and had no clue my story was in it, though I’m guessing they might have said something about that a couple of years ago and I just cannot remember. But, yes, you’ve guessed correctly, the Mia, the Dream Warrior is my story. And I’m doing quite well.
I cannot believe it’s almost been a year since I logged into this blog last. I am also in amazement looking through the stats how much traffic this blog has had. I hope that it is making a difference to all of the people who have passed through.
Earlier this year I ended therapy. I got to a point where I felt like I came so far and had so many tools I learned how to use to combat PTSD, that it seemed appropriate to complete therapy.
I have done a pretty good job of building relationships. As you could tell from my last post in 2014, I was unhappy with how other friendships which used to be stronger got weaker. I think those relationships have changed and I might just see those people a handful of times a year, and that’s ok as long as I keep working on other friendships in my life.
Earlier this year I had an experience to remember that made me realize just how far I have come, and how I am an “influencer”. An influencer “hasI have always had to give presentations in my career, and have always been successful at communicating in the workplace. But, when it comes to personal relationships and real connections with people, I sure feel like that is a lot more there than it was 5 years ago.
Recently, SuperBetter sent out some emails prompting people to join back in as ally’s. I am more than happy to do that to continue helping people get better from PTSD. So feel free to get in touch with me on here or on the forum, and I’ll be happy to be your ally.
I have still not felt comfortable sharing my project publicly with my family or friends. I have told a handful of friends, who are experiencing different kinds of post traumatic growth (not PTSD but other situations), in the hopes that my story could help them. But, I still feel like I need to keep my identity secret. It’s funny because the book came out and I kind of wanted to share it with some people that my story was in there, but then the other side of my brain said no, that’s not a good idea. Just let it be.
On the dream warrior front… I have had a lot less nightmares, if not just 1-2 in the past year. So that alone amazes me.
Yesterday I had a strange experience getting my morning coffee. The guy taking orders and taking care of business was just so frazzled, trying to do everything at once and so fast that his pace nearly gave me an anxiety attack. I kept thinking in my head, just chill out, it’s coffee, there’s no reason to act like that or you’re going to end up dying before you get to age 22. And seriously stressing yourself out is not going to get us our coffee any faster. And no one here is going, will you speed it up? He must have picked this up from me somehow because by the time I got to the front of the line, he had calmed down quite a bit.
I wondered if this was just that I was closer to the end of the line so there wasn’t a reason to hurry anymore. Or if like I’ve been told a million times over my life, that I have a calming effect over people. I’ve also been told I seem so calm when in situations where I should be freaking out. When in reality, inside I am totally freaking out. But, I also know that I have dealt with worse and can deal with whatever is being dished up. That’s resiliency.
I decided to google the phenomenon and google brought me to 7 Strengths Shy People Have.
3. Being quiet leads to a calming effect on others. Other people will notice that you do not say a whole heck of a lot, and very often they choose to view shy people as simply being more calm. In American society, where people are more often rewarded for “tooting their own horn,” being quiet and calm can have a profound positive impact on other people.
But, I also know that some people read being quiet as being stuck up.
A while ago I wrote about DISC personalities. The personalities are Dominance, Influence, Steadiness, and Conscientiousness. I tested very high for Influence. So maybe I can have a calming effect on some people. I’m probably just reading into things too much (hypervigilance), but it’s an observation.
How about you? Do you think you might have an influence on others? Do you think people pick up on each other’s tension or calmness and adjust to it? Or am I just super hypersensitive?